Stay at home Mum - I want to work

This is month.... 13(?) of being a stay at home parent. On days like today I would really like to go back to work. On days like last week, I'm happy being at home.

Life is not like this. But Wolf Children made me cry even before being a parent

For most of my life I've been saving money, now it's time to spend it so I can continue to stay at home and that's just really difficult for me! Every second month I go though the process of looking into different jobs, careers, volunteer positions, and then end up back to where I started. The process looks like this.

1. Feel stuck and stagnant
2. Look up a career that I've always wanted to try out
3. Get excited about it, tell people about it
4. Realise that new career would involve figuring out childcare
5. Write in my notebook the steps I would take to get into that career
6. Close notebook

I understand what opportunity cost is. I know, logically, that although childcare would eat up most of my wage now I have to consider future earnings. But, life is easier and less stressful with me at home for my whole family.

I could do more, I have lots of plans for things that I could do with my time, but sometimes naps get skipped or food gets thrown or (this happened for the first time today) somebody poos on the floor halfway through a nappy change. When I look at part-time or remote work that I could do, something like this drains me of energy.

It's easier staying at home, 8/10 days I like staying at home. I would just like a little external fulfilment as well. And some money coming in that's not from my savings account.